I got quite depressed yesterday…
I went to a bookshop in Dublin feeling, if not good, relatively OK… and after checking the poetry section, I walked over to the Humour section.
Within this section there were wonderful collections of exceptionally gifted humorists, such as Alan Coren, Woody Allen and SJ Perelman… But next to these collections were books like, ‘Potty, Fartwell and Knob’ which is a collection of funny names and ‘Who Writes this Crap’, too many words in the title, and other ‘Humour Books’ Of Dubious quality… The sight of these great Humorists in the same section as totally low-Humoured, unfunny books was what depressed me.
The master P.G. Wodehouse said that, ‘Humorists are looked down upon by the Intelligentsia’, I used to believe that this was due to Jealousy because of people’s inability to be humorous, now I’m not so sure. Maybe it is because the truly ghastly attempts at literature are humorous…
I believe Humour is exceptionally important… It is a belief I have that I have extended in the poetry and songs I write and perform to Children… I have been thinking about doing more regarding this, for a long time…
After this depressing episode yesterday, I believe I will…
Watch this space.
Friday, February 27, 2009
And other things...
Et Cetera, is a Latin phrase that means, ‘And other things’
Therefore can somebody please explain why it is the title, and the phrase is included in, the Chorus of Irelands 2009 Eurovision.
The lyrics, apart from being ghastly beyond belief, are about some guy who, I think, can’t make up his mind between two girls, and it is sung from the viewpoint of one of the said girls. There is nothing in the song which makes the word (or words, it can be spelt one wordly or bi-wordly) ‘etcetera’ appropriate.
Now I believe the song is bad, but that only means that it actually stands some chance in a competition that celebrates the appalling, but can someone please give me an idea why the lyric writer chose to name the song inappropriately?
Therefore can somebody please explain why it is the title, and the phrase is included in, the Chorus of Irelands 2009 Eurovision.
The lyrics, apart from being ghastly beyond belief, are about some guy who, I think, can’t make up his mind between two girls, and it is sung from the viewpoint of one of the said girls. There is nothing in the song which makes the word (or words, it can be spelt one wordly or bi-wordly) ‘etcetera’ appropriate.
Now I believe the song is bad, but that only means that it actually stands some chance in a competition that celebrates the appalling, but can someone please give me an idea why the lyric writer chose to name the song inappropriately?
Sunday, February 22, 2009
Gordon's Sympathy???????
There are many people in the British Isles who are tragically dying of various illnesses. Very few of them have ever come close to causing an international incident… And this makes British Prime Minister Gordon Brown, singling out one, who almost did cause said incident, for sympathetic words, very strange indeed.
Now I don’t blame him, he is probably pre-guessing the ‘Queen of Our Hearts’, Headlines that will inevitably follow from some in the media, interfering with extensive coverage of more important topics… Some in the media seem to want us all to watch Big Brother for some un-explained reason.
Fans of Trashy Reality Shows often use the phrase, ‘If you don’t like it don’t watch it’, as an argument, and in a way they are correct. I have never watched Big Brother and when I die I hope to be able to say the same… But when the leader of my home country, and many leaders, decide to use their position to make themselves look caring and people decide to tell me what I want to watch then it becomes my business…
I wish Jade no ill and would hope that she recovers, like I would wish anyone in that situation, but it is not news and it does not warrant being made news…
As I Blogged in January, Patrick McGoohan died, this was a man who created a television programme that demonstrated the plight of the individual and also the importance of individualism, Jade Goody and all reality TV programmes demonstrate the complete opposite and it is very interesting which story got the most coverage...
Now I don’t blame him, he is probably pre-guessing the ‘Queen of Our Hearts’, Headlines that will inevitably follow from some in the media, interfering with extensive coverage of more important topics… Some in the media seem to want us all to watch Big Brother for some un-explained reason.
Fans of Trashy Reality Shows often use the phrase, ‘If you don’t like it don’t watch it’, as an argument, and in a way they are correct. I have never watched Big Brother and when I die I hope to be able to say the same… But when the leader of my home country, and many leaders, decide to use their position to make themselves look caring and people decide to tell me what I want to watch then it becomes my business…
I wish Jade no ill and would hope that she recovers, like I would wish anyone in that situation, but it is not news and it does not warrant being made news…
As I Blogged in January, Patrick McGoohan died, this was a man who created a television programme that demonstrated the plight of the individual and also the importance of individualism, Jade Goody and all reality TV programmes demonstrate the complete opposite and it is very interesting which story got the most coverage...
Monday, February 16, 2009
I'm going to be on the Radio
Oh and another thing...
I am currently over the moon as I will be on the Radio tomorrow.
I have been asked to appear live on 'Laughter Tracks' on Dublin City FM 103.2. The show runs on Tuesdays from 3:00-3:30pm. I will be singing songs and reading poems from my upcoming collection.
You can find out more about Dublin City FM and listen live to it by going to the website www.dublincityfm.ie.
For those living in Ireland you can tune in to 103.2 FM
I am currently over the moon as I will be on the Radio tomorrow.
I have been asked to appear live on 'Laughter Tracks' on Dublin City FM 103.2. The show runs on Tuesdays from 3:00-3:30pm. I will be singing songs and reading poems from my upcoming collection.
You can find out more about Dublin City FM and listen live to it by going to the website www.dublincityfm.ie.
For those living in Ireland you can tune in to 103.2 FM
Tribute to the Worlds Greatest Wordsmith
Last month I discovered a cure for the January Blues, or rather I remembered a cure.
One morning last month I woke up and that is as far I wanted to take it… I really, really did not want to go to work… Now this is hardly unusual, but this time the feeling was stronger and more real… I toyed with the idea of phoning in sick, but finally after much toing-and-froing, I decided I needed to get up…
The dark clouds above were not alleviated by showering and not even coffee could snap me out of this unpleasantness…
I decided to forgo my current reading material for that day and instead picked up, ‘Heart of a Goof’, a collection of Golfing stories by the master, P.G. Wodehouse… After a couple of these stories, read whilst on the Dart, I felt a lot better, continuing them on the Bus, I felt ready to take the day on and fully believed, if I could steal one of Wodehouse Quotes, that God was in his Heaven and all was right with the world. I got to work and discovered a nasty E-mail sent by my team leader… I sent a relatively cheery one back, I will not have them undoing all of Wodehouse’s good work. Eventually the correspondence did dampen my mood slightly, but I shudder to think what it would have been like if I had gone to work whilst feeling the way I did when I first got up.
I was reminded of this today when I entered a book shop in Dublin, and saw a selection of newly published Wodehouse books (The publishing and style was new, obviously the books have been available for years.) These books came with complementary quotes on the front of the covers by various fans, some expected (Douglas Adams, Hugh Laurie, Lynne Truss) Some surprising me (Danny Baker, Christopher Biggins.) I then went on to think how cool that would be to have your quote on the front of a Wodehouse book, If my collection of poetry sells well and I become a bit more well known, that would be an ambition of mine, to have my complementary quote on the front of a Wodehouse novel. In fact any publisher can pick from the list below…
Wodehouse: The greatest user of the English Language ever.
The best cure for any malady is a quick dip into a Wodehouse Novel.
I think it is a crime, that Wodehouse isn’t studied at GCSE level when lesser wordsmith’s are.
The only depressing thing about Wodehouse is the knowledge that I will never be as funny as he was, but then no one will be.
Wodehouse Cheers up many a grey day.
That will do for the time being…
One morning last month I woke up and that is as far I wanted to take it… I really, really did not want to go to work… Now this is hardly unusual, but this time the feeling was stronger and more real… I toyed with the idea of phoning in sick, but finally after much toing-and-froing, I decided I needed to get up…
The dark clouds above were not alleviated by showering and not even coffee could snap me out of this unpleasantness…
I decided to forgo my current reading material for that day and instead picked up, ‘Heart of a Goof’, a collection of Golfing stories by the master, P.G. Wodehouse… After a couple of these stories, read whilst on the Dart, I felt a lot better, continuing them on the Bus, I felt ready to take the day on and fully believed, if I could steal one of Wodehouse Quotes, that God was in his Heaven and all was right with the world. I got to work and discovered a nasty E-mail sent by my team leader… I sent a relatively cheery one back, I will not have them undoing all of Wodehouse’s good work. Eventually the correspondence did dampen my mood slightly, but I shudder to think what it would have been like if I had gone to work whilst feeling the way I did when I first got up.
I was reminded of this today when I entered a book shop in Dublin, and saw a selection of newly published Wodehouse books (The publishing and style was new, obviously the books have been available for years.) These books came with complementary quotes on the front of the covers by various fans, some expected (Douglas Adams, Hugh Laurie, Lynne Truss) Some surprising me (Danny Baker, Christopher Biggins.) I then went on to think how cool that would be to have your quote on the front of a Wodehouse book, If my collection of poetry sells well and I become a bit more well known, that would be an ambition of mine, to have my complementary quote on the front of a Wodehouse novel. In fact any publisher can pick from the list below…
Wodehouse: The greatest user of the English Language ever.
The best cure for any malady is a quick dip into a Wodehouse Novel.
I think it is a crime, that Wodehouse isn’t studied at GCSE level when lesser wordsmith’s are.
The only depressing thing about Wodehouse is the knowledge that I will never be as funny as he was, but then no one will be.
Wodehouse Cheers up many a grey day.
That will do for the time being…
Friday, February 13, 2009
Down with the Kids...
There is an article in the Irish times which deals with the Pat Kenny/Pete Doherty Late Late Show...
The article tries to show how un-cool Pat Kenny is... Like it can be denied... But the article itself, is ridiculous, it is obvious that Mr Murtagh knows nothing about poetry.
For a start Doherty and Dylan are not poets, there is nothing poetic about the lines that he quotes.
He came off as an old man trying to be down with the kids and he failed miserably. For a start the lyric he quotes, and is so proud of, is, 'You charmed the Bees Knees of the Bees', Totally misquoted by Murtagh and therefore rendering the point he was trying to make redundant.
Doherty is a Drug addict who dated Kate Moss. That is all he is... He may attempt to write poetry with melody's but he is very bad at it, and therefore Pat Kenny did a very good job, for probably the first time ever… The only beef I have with him is that he compared PD with a true poetic genius, Shane MacGowan.
The article tries to show how un-cool Pat Kenny is... Like it can be denied... But the article itself, is ridiculous, it is obvious that Mr Murtagh knows nothing about poetry.
For a start Doherty and Dylan are not poets, there is nothing poetic about the lines that he quotes.
He came off as an old man trying to be down with the kids and he failed miserably. For a start the lyric he quotes, and is so proud of, is, 'You charmed the Bees Knees of the Bees', Totally misquoted by Murtagh and therefore rendering the point he was trying to make redundant.
Doherty is a Drug addict who dated Kate Moss. That is all he is... He may attempt to write poetry with melody's but he is very bad at it, and therefore Pat Kenny did a very good job, for probably the first time ever… The only beef I have with him is that he compared PD with a true poetic genius, Shane MacGowan.
Thursday, February 12, 2009
Pete and Pat...
It’s not often I side with Pat Kenny, but I just witnessed an interview with him and Pete Doherty on Youtube, and Pat is getting slagged off, by Doherty’s fans for asking him about drugs and Kate Moss, but I think there is nothing else to ask him about…
People refer to Doherty as a poet but he isn’t, he is someone who can rhyme Murder with Absurder… Drugs, Kate Moss, Getting arrested, A rock star for the Heat generation, that is all Pete Doherty is.
The only issue I have with Pat Kenny is the fact that he likened him to a true poetic genius, Shane MacGowan… There is no genuine comparison…
People refer to Doherty as a poet but he isn’t, he is someone who can rhyme Murder with Absurder… Drugs, Kate Moss, Getting arrested, A rock star for the Heat generation, that is all Pete Doherty is.
The only issue I have with Pat Kenny is the fact that he likened him to a true poetic genius, Shane MacGowan… There is no genuine comparison…
Sunday, February 1, 2009
Not Nominated...
Well I can only assume that I am either, Not Funny or Nobody reads my blog, how else can anyone explain my absence from the nominations for ‘best humour blog’ in the Irish Blog awards? Especially when one of the Nominations, ‘Our National Disgrace’, Hasn’t posted anything since 2004.
If it is one of those reasons, I’m actually hoping that nobody reads me, because I really do not want people thinking of me as not funny.
I have a dream this year, I would love for my poetry collection, which should be released before the end of April, to be nominated for a Roald Dahl Funny Award, that was introduced by Children’s Laureate, Michael Rosen. This would be wonderful, but if I’m not funny than I can forget that.
But if no one reads me then that will mean that I have been wasting my time writing this and any of my Blogs as no-one has been reading it.
Oh well whatever the reason… There is always next year…
Bigger Than John Lennon?
A totally un-Topical Poem.
John Lennon once said that 'The Beatles were more popular than Jesus Christ' He has often been misquoted as saying 'Bigger than Jesus Christ' I have therefore written this verse about it.
Jesus entered the club
And to the microphone he went.
He hushed the crowd and said
“I’d like to make an announcement.
Despite of what he said
I’m bigger than John Lennon
John was only 5 foot ten
Whereas I’m 5 foot eleven.”
“But,” replied a punter,
“Far be it for me to disagree,
But, John Lennon said, The Beatles
Together, bigger than you they would be.
And, correct me if I’m wrong,
If on each others shoulders they got
Looking down on the top of your head
They would be, would they not?”
Jesus thought about this and realised
“Oh no that is true,
But I’m the son of God I can’t be wrong.”
And before our eyes he grew.
That’s right a miracle was performed
In front of the clientele
And said, ‘take that Mr Lennon
Ringo, George and Paul as well.’
Then Jesus before he left,
The Barman he did thank
And he turned the bottles of Evian
Into Sauvignon Blanc.
John Lennon once said that 'The Beatles were more popular than Jesus Christ' He has often been misquoted as saying 'Bigger than Jesus Christ' I have therefore written this verse about it.
Jesus entered the club
And to the microphone he went.
He hushed the crowd and said
“I’d like to make an announcement.
Despite of what he said
I’m bigger than John Lennon
John was only 5 foot ten
Whereas I’m 5 foot eleven.”
“But,” replied a punter,
“Far be it for me to disagree,
But, John Lennon said, The Beatles
Together, bigger than you they would be.
And, correct me if I’m wrong,
If on each others shoulders they got
Looking down on the top of your head
They would be, would they not?”
Jesus thought about this and realised
“Oh no that is true,
But I’m the son of God I can’t be wrong.”
And before our eyes he grew.
That’s right a miracle was performed
In front of the clientele
And said, ‘take that Mr Lennon
Ringo, George and Paul as well.’
Then Jesus before he left,
The Barman he did thank
And he turned the bottles of Evian
Into Sauvignon Blanc.
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